NS Medical Checkup
Several inches away from the crack of dawn, i was harshly awakened (as usual) by "PA PA YAO ZHOU LE!!!" in my grandmother's idealistically prophetic shriek. That translates to "Pa is leaving already!!!" by the way, which of course did not happen for the next half an hour, leaving me to wallow in grogginess at the dining table.
Soon, we were off to the Central Manpower Base, where I was about to embark on the treacherous journey to become a 'man' via my NS Medical Checkup. By 'man' i actually mean brainwashed, patriotic slave, but you aren't supposed to know that ;)
I reached there earlier than expected, but joined the queue of aspiring(-for-it-to-end-quickly) 18-year olds. There were a surprising many from RJC, and apparently, most of the people here were pushed back from a later date. Might I wrathfully add that 'I MISSED THE DESIGNATED ELECTION HOLIDAY FOR THIS'? No? Argh the politics of your Id blogging to your Ego.
Anyway, there were the stations of ECG, blood tests, Blood Pressure (120/61/66), Height&Weight (176, 70kg), etc. The highlights (or lowlights) however, were the URINE test and the fabled and dreaded consultation.
The urine test had the best hidden and most vague instructions. They handed us a bottle and a strip and asked us to go into the toilet, after which silence ensued. A confused me pee'd directly on the strip, before realising that one was supposed to excrete into the bottle first, then dip the strip in in a civilised manner. Oops.
The consultation had the doctor asking to 'drop your pants' and 'bend over to the front, touch your toes'. Sound familiar? RAP LYRICS! I swear i woulda did some human beatboxing or broken into breakdancing on the spot siah..
To top off the ordeal, the harrowing(ly tedious) intelligence tests that followed lasted a whopping 2.5 hours, with irritatingly simple number and word problems.
In the end, its PES A as expected. Whee and some lieutenant i was talking to asked me to consider being a pilot or commando..
Dreading the GP to... Promiscuous Girl - Nelly Furtado ft Timbaland
Soon, we were off to the Central Manpower Base, where I was about to embark on the treacherous journey to become a 'man' via my NS Medical Checkup. By 'man' i actually mean brainwashed, patriotic slave, but you aren't supposed to know that ;)
I reached there earlier than expected, but joined the queue of aspiring(-for-it-to-end-quickly) 18-year olds. There were a surprising many from RJC, and apparently, most of the people here were pushed back from a later date. Might I wrathfully add that 'I MISSED THE DESIGNATED ELECTION HOLIDAY FOR THIS'? No? Argh the politics of your Id blogging to your Ego.
Anyway, there were the stations of ECG, blood tests, Blood Pressure (120/61/66), Height&Weight (176, 70kg), etc. The highlights (or lowlights) however, were the URINE test and the fabled and dreaded consultation.
The urine test had the best hidden and most vague instructions. They handed us a bottle and a strip and asked us to go into the toilet, after which silence ensued. A confused me pee'd directly on the strip, before realising that one was supposed to excrete into the bottle first, then dip the strip in in a civilised manner. Oops.
The consultation had the doctor asking to 'drop your pants' and 'bend over to the front, touch your toes'. Sound familiar? RAP LYRICS! I swear i woulda did some human beatboxing or broken into breakdancing on the spot siah..
To top off the ordeal, the harrowing(ly tedious) intelligence tests that followed lasted a whopping 2.5 hours, with irritatingly simple number and word problems.
In the end, its PES A as expected. Whee and some lieutenant i was talking to asked me to consider being a pilot or commando..
Dreading the GP to... Promiscuous Girl - Nelly Furtado ft Timbaland
Came, Saw and Conquered by dw 5:32 PM
3 Comments:
At 4:23 PM ,
Anonymous said...
Wait. This post is really sth else. First, that "bend over" thingy. Did he give u a good effing after tat or was tat just to see how yer balls hang out when bent? Anyone care to enlighten wat this test is supposed to be all abt? *Smiles.
Second, wat is the diff between peeing direct onto a PH strip or into a bot? In fact you cut down the process by a step. And the whole strip gets awashed in urea than juz the usual tip. Isnt this a good thing?
At 8:47 PM ,
Anonymous said...
It's probably for sclerosis.
and it's easier to handle a strip that isn't drenched. 500 soggy strips a day get's little tiresome.
At 11:41 PM ,
Anonymous said...
For pete's sake and for hygiene sake, I am sure they wear surgical gloves and use tweezers or tongs to handle the strips. Or don't they?
Phew, tok abt insanity.
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