Harry Potter and the Preposterous Subtitle

To enjoy a good movie, watch Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. To enjoy a good spoof, turn on the subtitles of any pirated less original version.

Dumbledore on the House system:
"Your tramps will earn you points!"

"Griffindor, Afapaff, Ravenclaw and Slitertit..."

Snape questioning Harry:
"What is the difference between monkey wood and wolf beam?"

Quirrel warning the Halloween feasters:
"Trog is in the dungeon!"

McGonagall praising Harry and Ron for defeating the 'trog':
"... for shared dump luck!"

Hagrid warning the kids not to be nosy:
"You're mad and things you're not meant to be mad in"

Harry examining the Invisibility Cloak:
"Its some kind of croak"

"the Mirror of Araset"

Hagrid and his English colloquialisms
"Blind me, you still don't like him!"

Hagrid commenting on Norbert, the Norweigean Ridgeback:
"its a Novigem Witch Bat!"

Hagrid on the 'trick with any beast being to calm it":
"the trade with any beast is to no comment"

Voldemort complaining about his state of life:
"Live on another human's back side"



Never seeing Harry the same way again to... Everytime (Valentin Remix) - Britney Spears